#i used to try to convert people when i was younger but i learned that people only change when they want to change

[fallow-grove]

You know who I am but uhhh sorry I reacted the way I did to your post about a post about veganism.

I just followed u recently for context bc I remembered I wasn't following.

its ok dude i dont even remember what u said at this point and i dont need to lol

right now im just trying to figure out how the hell to activate cakewalk

[thatdeadaquarius]

@goldensunsetchild Asked:

Hello there! I know that you might be busy right now but I wanted to let you know an idea that I have, greatly inspired by your post: spanish reader who gets homesick but instead of getting depressed by it starts to do things they used to do back on their world. Dancing to their traditional dances while singing their accompanying songs, teaching the children the games they used to play when they were younger and also telling folktales to everyone who is interested in listening to. If you decide to do this idea and want to incorporate things from Costa Rica, please let me know and I'll help you with anything you need (⁠◍⁠•⁠ᴗ⁠•⁠◍⁠)⁠✧⁠*⁠。

(Content under cut)

HELLO YES SORRY IT TOOK ME SO DAMN LONG TO GET TO THIS!! 😭 /gen

I went to Costa Rica back in highschool in 2018? I think, and when I tell you I FELL IN LOVEEEE <3333

Costa Rica is a beautiful country and everyone was really nice, vibes were immaculate 🤌 ✨

☆

Sun: Costa Rican Reader! (you/they/them)

Stars: Sumeru cast

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: None known & Trigger Warnings: alcohol usage/drinking game.

Orbit: Headcanons-ish

☆

when u first crash landed in Teyvat, people luckily recognized you from when u were a player!

and u took in whatever culture and traditions everyone was so excited to show you as they were kind enough to give u clothes/food/shelter etc.

butttt… it did get overwhelming after a few months, and u got homesick more and more often :(

after all there wasn’t really an equivalent country to Costa Rica, and you couldn’t just take a plane back home, you were stuck here for… however long it takes someone to leave a video game universe??

You decided to actually do smth abt the crippling depression and “outsider” feelings instead of just rotting away, and went to Sumeru to get closer to the greenery of your home,

it made you feel a little better, but it could be the best, so u decide to lowkey force everyone in Sumeru to convert to Costa Rican LMAO

so ofc u did the most logical thing to convert ppl to a culture, the food!

u helped fund a small restaurant full of classic Costa Rican foods (coughandsoyoucaneatitwheneveryouwantcough)

(u still have the insane mora leftover from what u had in game so ur basically one of the richest ppl in Teyvat ngl 💀)

u recreated just the basic gallo pinto/casado with what was available (some beans from Natlan and rice from Inazuma/Liyue, the Ajilenakh nut from Sumeru acc kinda acts like plantains :0 and local fish/greens for salad)

Needless to say Sumeru is fascinated by the new cuisine and esp since its not a secret that you’ve funded it/made the menu from your homeworld

Alhaitham orders the casado most of the time bc he “admires the exact proportions, its all the nutrients you need, perfectly balanced” NERDDD

Tighnari likes barbudos bc there's not a lot of egg dishes in Sumeru but there are a lot of greens, so he “likes the familiar in unique combinations!”

unsurprisingly, Cyno likes Chancelta bc he can pick it up, eat it quickly, and go on with his patrol

Collei, Kaveh (and secretly Dehya lol) really like being able to munch and snack on sugar cane, (and the plantain imitation desserts!)

(u found sugarcane deep in sumeru forests, it was like on ur world, but sweet flowers sprouted out of the stalks too!)

You decide the next phase was to introduce dances and other fun stuff!!

Nilou was literally shaking with excitement to learn the traditional dances <3 (and also getting ur permission to add fun twists or Sumeru elements to them)

the kids that like to hang around and watch the troupe practice (and join) absolutely got obsessed with swing criollo, it was so cute to watch them all pair up and kinda trip over their own feet trying the footwork out

(u may or may not have teared up bc the band learned how to play a Spanish song for u guys to dance to, just for you)

teaching the theater troupes musicians how to adapt upbeat songs like Caballito Nicoyano or Ticas Lindas

omg getting Nilou Kaveh Faruzan Cyno Dehya (and Dunyazard!) to do the calipso limonense always cheers you up, (which is why they are so eager to do it when ur feeling homesick ❤️‍🩹)

Kaveh steps on too many people’s toes, Dehya gets dizzy from the spins/turns easily, Faruzan keeps spinning for too long, Nilou and Dunyazard are actually secretly latina bc they're so good at it (did they outdo you?? no, no they couldn't possibly-)

and Cyno just really likes the little dance line everyone makes lol

speaking of the General Mahamatra

FOR THE LOVE OF GOD

u CANNOT teach Cyno a new game from your home country, and expect him to NOT be the most competitive mf in Teyvat abt it

that's actually how u spread any games from back home, Cyno just does all the work for you and challenges ppl to things like jackses and no one knows what it is

which he then proceeds to strong arm them into learning and beat their asses at it

(yes Cyno wins against you a lot, sorry lmao)

You definitely had a drinking game centered around it one time and the consequences changed with each person who lost

like Cyno had to learn how to cook tamales that were edible, and more importantly..

Alhaitham had to at least attempt the swing criollo lol

(was it unfairly attractive? maybe. was watching Nilou, who was teaching him, and Alhaitham both do swing criollo 2x as attractive?? that's just for u and the Sumeru vision users to know)

SPEAKING OF ALHAITHAM

absolutely hilarious, yet also impressive?? how quickly he picked up ur slang

smug bastard picked it up based off sheer context/vibes too, u didn't even explain it to him, just u trying to go sit down in ur Costa Rican restaurant and he pulls u back before someone mows u down saying “hey, suave un toque-”

YOUR NECK FUCKING CRACKING BC U WHIPPED AROUND TO LOOK AT HIM SO FAST LMAOOO

(ngl u scared the fuck out of the poor scholar before he got all smug abt knowing slang)

accidentally spread this knowledge to other vision users bc he got in the habit of casually using it, tbh more often when ur not around lol (Alhaitham being caught having habits bc he's fond of other ppl?? never)

his favorite is “qué chante��😒 ” obv lol

so now the forest rangers use stuff like pura vida and tuanis sending each other off on patrols! Collei so cutely excited to explain to other Sumeru ppl or tourists where the words come from and what they mean, spreading ur Costa Rica agenda very well 👌

and the mahamatra like to use “Jale pa’la choza” when coming back from the desert to Sumeru city homebase! :)

ALSO bonus:

u absolutely got leyendas into the bedtime warning/ghost stories of the entirety of Sumeru children lmao

u start spooking kids like Dori (Nahida finds them fascinating)

and after awhile u notice Cyno and Dehya mentioning watching out at night for La Llorona or los cadejos 💀??

like you've genuinely made them paranoid, bc they wanna be sweethearts and protect you from them, like even if they don't believe they exist, they're worried you do and are trying to make u feel better lol <3

☆

an iced coffee? for me?? :O 

Blessed be Costa Rica, such a lovely country when I went, and as soon as I got off the plane coming back the first thing I did was make a Costa Rican meal the best I could

like got my mom to prep from dry black beans and rice etc. as fresh as we could get (nowhere near costa rica level btw) and made fresh guac and fried plantain chips and salmon I think? literally cooked the first night back bc I knew I missed the food already/knew id get sick

and I was RIGHT, that food I made was fine, but any other American food so bad I got nauseous

I literally got sick COMING BACK TO THE U.S like 😨???!!! I knew it was bad but not THAT bad lmao

and the first meal I had after that was still a homecooked meal, like my mom made it💀

love the coffee from there too, we even ordered coffee from the farm we visited when I got back to US it was so good (10x better than American obv)

THANK YOU BTW GOLDEN!! FOR BEING SO PATIENT AND LOVELY TELLING ME ALL ABT COSTA RICA <3333

I hope this did some amount of justice to ur beautiful home! :)

Safe Travels Golden Child,

💀♒

If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"

(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/specifically this AU/fandom, please!")

♡my beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks / @devilangel657 / @esthelily

[cilil]

Today I unearthed a folder in which I saved some good memories from school, mostly drawings and doodles I made together with friends or by myself, and it's making me emotional.

I... found that I made fanart for a game I loved at that time and... the art wasn't bad. Especially for a teenager and beginner artist (yes, I am a beginner artist to this day, it's embarrassing, I know). The art was cute, even has some attempts at shading and converting colors to black and white. I like it. A lot actually.

And now I just sit on my bed, holding these old sketches, and wonder why I never pursued art. I loved it so much. I had fun. My younger self wouldn't have kept these drawings if not, and my older self can see it on the paper, in every line, every stroke, every tiny grain of pencil dust.

What made me think that this wasn't worth pursuing, not worth trying again until many years later? What discouraged me? I don't remember an exact moment or anything; the only thing I know for sure is that I knew and believed - and know and believe to this day, to be honest - that there's a lack of innate ability on my part and that others my age are so far ahead and were back then as well. Hell, I've been behind since I failed to color within the lines in kindergarten.

It feels and felt like a fool's errand to deal with my clumsy hands and messed up back for hours just to end up with something that is... maybe charming in my eyes, but so, so subpar in the grand scheme of things.

I stuck to writing in the end because it was the only thing people said I was good at. And I'm glad I - just this once - had the courage to do so and to keep going and, eventually, push myself into sharing it on the internet too. Through sheer delusion and determination and lots, oh, lots of writing I clawed myself up to a place where I feel just confident enough in my skills to not constantly question myself and happily create.

And therein lies the answer for art as well, doesn't it? "Just keep trying, just put in all those hours and days and months and years of work for it as well, until your hands bleed and your back gives out, eventually you'll get there! Talent is not required either!"

But it's not that simple. I'm not sure I can do this again, muster enough courage and delusion to be terrible for years until I finally start making things that go from subpar to mediocre. And maybe never from mediocre to decent or even good.

When I learned to write, I had other people's claims that I was talented to fall back on and wasn't as hopelessly behind other people. Now motivation is lower and frustration is higher. Learning curves and empty canvases paralyze me; the last time I made art it took me 2 full hours until I could push past it. Not to mention that I'd picked out all references and tutorials and everything a week before.

Where does this leave us? What will I do, you ask? Well. Even if I never beat these demons I can assure you that, every once in a while, the urge will overcome me and I will attempt something. Maybe I'll learn and improve just a little by accident. Maybe I'll even get my ass up and actually learn sometime.

I am technically currently doing an art event somewhere else, so at the very least I will be forced to make a few pieces.

And I know myself a bit better these days. That also helps.

I know that, if anything will get me past the demons, it's obsession, the need to illustrate my own fics and, most importantly, porn.

[feeshies]

(Obligatory "not all Christians" disclaimer) But I do wish I could learn more about Christianity without feeling unsafe/uncomfortable. A while ago, I found a video that went into the specific practices of different denominations and I thought it was super cool and helped me to understand the nuances of the religion more, but then I dug into the creator's channel and saw that they were openly queerphobic and using their videos specifically to convert and "save" younger millennials and gen-z. In the past, there were times when I would invite Christians to tell me about their faith, and it feels like they're speedrunning to get me into the baptism pool.

I don't feel that way about other faiths. Throughout my entire life, I've had plenty of Jewish friends, family members, employers, and teachers who I could listen to without ever feeling on edge. I once went on a date with a girl who talked about her experiences as a Hindu, where she explained the details of her religion (and a fun story where she almost ran into a forbidden area of one of the temples because she was being chased by a monkey) and I loved every minute. My grandmother talking about the different Buddhist temples she went to growing up was nice, but my cousins cornering my mom and me when we first landed in Korea to give us pamphlets for their church felt different.

I wish I could have these same interactions with Christians. But no matter how genuine or in good faith (pun intended?) they may try to be, it's hard not to remove the more predatory interactions out of my mind. If I agree to go to church with you, I don't know if I'm being given an invitation or a sales pitch. I know this isn't fair on my part and I shouldn't let past experiences paint my perception. But I don't know if this is the case of a few isolated incidents or a general "vibe." I wish I could share being able to learn about a very important and personal part of people's lives and identity, but part of me also feels like I need to be on guard and protect myself.

(And please, this post is not an invitation. There are times when I am open to talk about this and learn more, but this post is not for that.)

[roselyn-writing]

Finally, After a month of working on Adeleois/Rakan lore, I managed to wrote it 😁. Let’s get started now!

Name: Rakan (Mortal) Adeleois (Mantle/Divine name).

Name meaning: In Arabic, Rakan means ‘noble’

Age: 450 Y.O.

Date of birth: 13 July. (791, In Virginian time and year).

Hair colour: Black (formerly) Silver (currently)

Eyes colour: Light Brown (formerly) Silver (currently). (Silver with violet and blue hues when he uses his powers.)

Aesthetics/Colours: Silver, Grey, Night aesthetics, moon aesthetic, moonlight, Bohemian aesthetic. Warrior aesthetics, pagan. Etc.

Favourite colours: Black, Silver, Navy blue, White.

Likes: to help people, being honest, practicing his Kophesh sword. Spread peace and justice. Loves to admire the moon. (In its every phase). Likes to read, eating healthy, Lover of mountains, lover of nature, lover of caves.

Hates: liars, bigots (Hate them with his VERY heart), Thieves, murderers, abusers, racists, Racism, Wars, and etc.

Favourite food: Beef Barley soup with roasted veggies, Mushrooms salad, Porridge. Tea, coffee, hot beverages. Bread and cheese, chocolate muffin. Beef chops.

Least favourite food: Ice cream (any flavour).

Wardrobe/outfits:

“I will defend the defenseless and protect the innocent till my last breath!” ——- Adeleois’s quote, The moon warrior.

🗡️The lore 🌕

CW: Gore and blood, Bigotry and etc.

In the glorious mountain Kythera of Virginia. An ancient place filled with power and wonder. Where the only worthy will be bestowed upon such power of divinity and wisdom.

There, on top of the mountain and beyond is fit place for living, There is a tribe called So’lar they worship and venerate the sun, They deem all other sources of light inferior.

They disrespect the people who worship the stars, the planets, the sky, but the most people who are tortured and disrespected by them; were the people who worship the moon. They are called the ‘Moon’aris’ and the Sun worshippers are called ‘Sun’aris’

The Sun’aris always call other people who worship and venerate other things ‘Lestsi’ which means: ‘Blasphemers’ or ‘Heretics’ or ‘unbelievers’

The Sun’aris took a lot of prisoners of the Moon’aris and tortured them until they abandoned their beliefs and converted to their religion, and worship the sun like them.

Rakan, was born in a place closer to the So’lar. But he found his way into the tribe because of the tribe scouts, They brought him there as a baby and decided to welcome him into the tribe.

They made sure to tell him of their ‘glorious’ religion when he grew up. And they did. They taught him everything they want. And they did the same to other children.

Rakan grew up into the So’lar tribe. He learned their ways and embraced them. He thought they are true and righteous until the day that changed his life forever.

Rakan, Who is 16 years old, He saw the scouts of the tribe brought a few people of the Moon’aris, They were two women and a man.

They were tortured brutally because they refused to abandon their beliefs. Rakan and his best friend: Andreas, they were traumatised by this.

They saw the tribe leader: Alexander, shoving his hand into the woman’s throat and pulled her vocal cords out along with other soft bloody tissues. She screamed loudly, in pain and horror; it was a macabre sight, the floor was painted in a crimson canvas of the innocent woman’s blood, she was tortured brutally, she gurgled loudly, trying to summon a cry of help and plea but she couldn’t, because her vocals cords were pulled out of her throat, Rakan changed forever. He doesn’t want to be a part of this tribe. He winced in pain at that sight and it was forever in his mind.

That sight was enough to haunt Rakan for the rest of his life, The woman was still alive when the leader tortured her like that.

Rakan and Andreas were best friends from their younger days, They ate together, played together and even studied together, They were known as ‘brothers in arms’ and they friendship was strong, one time, Andreas saved his friend Rakan from a stampede of the desert beasts. Their bond became much stronger ever since.

One day, Rakan was admiring the full moon in the night, Andreas, once again, warned him that he shouldn’t get caught while watching and admiring the moon, Rakan noted and left, after that, He heard a voice, it told Rakan he should climbed the mountain and he will see something he need. Rakan, begrudgingly agreed, He climbed the mountain with the man, After he and the man reached the mountain top.

Rakan felt something strange yet beautiful, He was admiring the full moon again. Suddenly, A bright and blinding light of the moon came down on Rakan, Bathing him in the moonlight, He felt his flesh wrought anew, reborn in the moonlight as a beacon; ready to fight for justice and the truth, it felt like eons then it dissipated, Rakan saw his reflection on the glassy rocks of the mountain, He noticed his face and everything about him changed, His looks, his body and everything thing, There are even tattoos and crescent moon mark on his forehead and body.

Fully adorned with armor made of moonlight and bestowed upon the powers of the moon. Rakan decided to use his newfound powers to protect the innocent, defend the defenseless and bring justice to the land of Kythera, He took his Kophesh sword that was made from moonlight and dashed like a moonlight meteorite to fight for freedom and justice.

Rumors and words spread alike, about a new moon warrior. That came to rescue the other people who aren’t worshipping the sun and thus being oppressed by the Sun’aris, The Sun’Aris deeply loathed this new information and they decided to search for this warrior and kill him on sight.

The leader of the Sun’aris knew of Rakan disappearance but he didn’t care at all. He thought that he died or something. But he didn’t knew that Rakan became the next Moon Warrior that is protecting the oppressed people who aren’t worshipping the sun. He is protecting morning, noon and night. He didn’t tire while doing so.

The leader of the Sun’Aris: Alexander, didn’t believe his eyes or ears, when his scouts told him of a new aspect of the moon, His eyes widened, his mouth fell agape as he tried to process their words. He even asked them again.

“Is this true?” He inquired.

They all nodded, Their faces tell the answer. “Yes, It is.”

“Yeah, He is Rakan,” one of the scouts volunteerd.

In pure anger, He threw his pen and everything on his desk on the floor. He looked terrified and confused. He looked at his scouts but they didn’t answer him let alone reacted to his meltdown. They bowed their heads and excused themselves to leave.

Alexander vowed that he will kill this new moon warrior, and he will bathe in his blood to satisfy his hatred and anger.

It was from that moment, Alexander made Andreas hate his best friend: Rakan, He managed to poison Andreas’s hearts and made him feel ‘abandoned’ and ‘betrayed’ by his so-called best friend: Rakan.

Andreas began to hate Rakan, He began to train more and more to prove himself the best warrior in mounth Kythera, He even became the aspect of the sun himself: Sunayois

Rakan or preferred to be called Adeleois, He is protecting the people of Moon’ari, Satarins and other people who worship other things, This made Alexander even more angrier and hateful.

Adeleois was excellently deluding the Sun’aris attacks and traps, He even killed them when they refused to leave him alone, bloods on his hands, his armor and on his Kophesh, So his hands are pretty much tied. He was forced to kill, he disliked killing,

The Sun’aris vowed to find Adeleois and kill him, but they couldn’t defeat him if they found him, He was far too powerful for them. He is strategic, calm, and patient unlike Sun’aris, they were brash, aggressive and aren’t strategic at all.

Adeleois is threatened with death and torture, but he didn’t care at all, his devotion was set aflame when he saw there are people who needed him, people who would pray for a saviour and Adeleois answered their prayers, His life isn’t important when he saw the numbers of people being tortured and killed for what they believe in, and —Lady Selene, The beautiful and benevolent woman who is currently the Queen of the Moon’aris. She needed him, They needed him.

It had been years of war between the Sun’aris and Adeleois, the latter managed to unite the Moon’aris, the sky worshippers, Thee satarins, and the planets worshippers to join him and aid him against those monsters, who will oppress anyone that does not convert to their religion.

All are united against the Sun’aris, The battle was fierce, bloody, merciless for the Sun’aris and yet they couldn’t win at all, because, they weren’t strong and united enough to win against Adeleois and his allies, Adeleois announced that the previous Adeleois was Andreas’s father, He was shocked when he knew that Alexander killed his father. Andreas turned on Alexander, Thus, Rakan and Andreas are friends again.

In the end, Adeleois and his allies won, Adeleois banished Alexander from Mount Kythera, The latter went to another place where he can live with his beliefs and etc, he lived alone and died alone.

Thus, All races and other people who have different religions lived together and in peace, giving way to a new era of peace and harmony and prosperity among all other people and religions.

[hot-take-tournament]

HOT TAKE TOURNAMENT!

PRELIMINARY #242

Submission 51

Balloon Boy is a good character and does not deserve hate.

I would like to be very vulnerable despite my anonymity and put forward a letter of sorts I wrote to the FNAF community when I was around 13-14 years old and even less medicated than I am now. I never posted this letter anywhere and it has sat in an old kids' PDF book creator app on my iPad for almost ten years. It's cringe. It's dumb. I was frustrated with a community I was hardly a part of. But even today I still don't think Balloon Boy is as terrible as the fandom made (and still makes) him out to be. Maybe I'm just more resistant to repetitive sounds, I dunno. He was a major comfort character for me, for whatever reason, so I must confess my continued bias. The following is that weird manifesto I wrote in a "fit of annoyance."

And I quote,

"A message to all Balloon Boy haters: We're the ones that know true sympathy. Of course, there ARE the ones who are truly evil, but then there are the ones that did not realize their wrong until it was too late. You, my fellow FNAF lovers, still have much to learn... Sure, you can say that you are not fond of a certain object, place or person, a noun, but that does not mean that you must tell the world in great detail. Saying it once or twice, okay, now the ones you've told know you don't like who, what or where. But if you keep bringing it up, that can lead to loneliness. Abandonment even. We all have our differences. This is true, and I respect all of that. But just because there's a divide doesn't necessarily make us different. We all have opinions. But just because it's your opinion doesn't make it a universal fact. Respect the other peoples opinions. 'WHAT???!! How can you like that??!!!' Try not to ask questions like that with so much intensity. A simple 'Why?' can suffice. Don't go into detail. Once you learn the reasons of the opinion, then maybe you can understand our sympathy.

It's not just because he's 'cute' or whatever. Think of if he had feelings. Sure, you can say 'But he's just a fictional character! Stop sympathizing!' but that would rule out your opinion too. By saying we cannot sympathize because he is not a real person, you basically have to cancel out any emotion directed toward him except neutrality BECAUSE YOU JUST SAID HE IS FICTIONAL. If he is truly fictional, then we cannot have any type of feelings whatsoever towards him, whether love or hate. Everyone has their faults. Just because someone is annoying does not mean they are evil and the devil. Being annoying isn't really evil. Think if he was the actual one to kill you. Sure, they could be intentionally annoying just to irritate someone, and do it a lot, but that doesn't necessarily mean they are evil. I respect everyone's opinion, and I am not aiming to convert everyone to respecting BB, but at least give him some credit. He does his job, doesn't he? If you hate him, alright, that's fine, but it's not very courteous or friendly to make a big deal of it and shun us BB lovers. Your opinions are opinions, not facts. I will admit, BB can be annoying, but at least feel sympathy a little and respect everyone's different opinion. Also, just because I view stuff where BB is considered 'part of the illuminati' or 'the enragement child' doesn't mean I'm a BB hater myself. I take those remarks as JOKES. Even if I'm wrong, I make it seem to myself that those people aren't hating Balloon Boy, they just found aspects of him to fit into certain jokes that would be considered humorous.

Thank you."

Obviously I was incredibly dramatic. I was waxing poetic to hundreds of thousands of people who would never read my words. I don't think it would have changed anything in the fandom and I probably would have been kys'd off the internet, so it's probably good I didn't post it anywhere. I didn't even have any proper social media past Google+ at the time anyway. Do I still agree with my younger self? For the most part, yeah! Their wording left something to be desired, obviously. I don't think "We're the ones that know true sympathy," is all that impactful even if it sounds fancy. It's just fandom drama, younger me. I wasn't wrong, though! The hate towards Balloon Boy due to his game mechanic and annoying laugh was incredibly blown out of proportion. In FNAF fandom culture at the time he was almost only ever characterized as The Worst Child Ever(tm) and bullied to all hell even though his characterization was next to none...just like every other animatronic, really. Maybe that's just a general fandom problem, but I digress. He could have still been the annoying kid without becoming the antichrist or whatever.

Balloon Boy is a cute little kid who happens to be a troublemaker, basically. That's all he is. Maybe calm down and lessen up on animating Freddy smashing this poor kid's head into the wall in SFM, I dunno.

Sorry it took so long for me to post this. I know it takes guts to be vulnerable on the internet, even anonymously <3

Propaganda is always encouraged!

And remember to reblog your favourite polls for exposure!

[pogirosary]

My Realization of Self and God

I never thought much of my spirituality and how it affected the people around me. Especially my family, relatives and friends. I always thought it was strictly between myself and God. Growing up as a young boy no one ever called me a name,nor degraded me in any way because of my "religion" or my "religious practices." I never had to defend myself against harsh religious comments. I can't say that during our younger years, we all "respected" each other's religion. Sixth grade and below, we didn't really understand things such as respect and religion; Seventh grade and above, guys were more interested in girls and cars and girls were more interested in guys and their cars. Religion just wasn't one of the personal characteristics we were interested in. As an adult however, it seams to be just the opposite. Religion and the religious practices of a person are very important to that person's family and friends. Sometimes a change in a person's religion or religious practices causes such an outrage in that person's family that the person becomes ostracized from his or her family. 

My "spirituality" has become a concern of some in my immediate family. My beliefs and spiritual life is not the same as it was when I left home at the age of 18 after enlisting in the Navy. Words such as "idol worshiper" and "Mary worshiper" have been used by those who I hold in very high esteem. My core values (which I will explain later) have been strained, but they do remain in tact. I respect everyone and their view of what I have become, even if I don't agree with their assessment. when I was very young, patience was one of the things I lacked and a temper was something I had in abundance. Today I have an abundance of patients and the strength and guidance from God to use it wisely against the temper I once had. So, bring on your judgments of me and my wife but also know that I leave judgment to God. I will continue to live the religious practices, traditions and spiritual mannerisms I have learned from the Catholic Church, prayer and research. I leave it to the Lord to defend His religious practices, traditions and spiritual mannerisms as they are lived out in my life. 

Some might say I "converted" to Catholicism but, no, I think I grew into it. It took a lot of thinking, soul-searching, research, looking back and looking forward, trying to see how God and spirituality fit into my life. It did not happen "overnight" or even over a decade. 

I was born into a white Anglo-Saxon Protestant world - Baptist to be precise. The first church I remember attending is Donald Smith Memorial Baptist Church in Oaklawn, Illinois. It was kinda-sorta behind our house. It was a rectangular two-story building. The first floor was for "Sunday School" for the kids, the second floor was the main chapel. It was just pews, pulpit and a large head and shoulder portrait of Jesus above the choir loft behind the pulpit. I even remember Mrs. Cunningham who was both my first grade public school teacher and my Sunday School teacher. She would seek out my Mom every Sunday morning <sigh> I couldn't get away with anything that year. I was too young then to really understand who God was and what he did. 

After 5th grade, my family moved to New Lenox Illinois. We started going to Ridgewood Baptist Church in Joliet. I don't remember too much about it. If my memory serves me correctly, both of my sisters, at one time or another, worked in the Church Office. it was another rectangular building with pews and a pulpit, with no pictures, statues or any other artwork. It didn't leave much of an impression on me. I don't know, I was still young then. After a couple of years, my parents started going to the First Baptist Church of New Lenox. It was very small. Again, it was another rectangular building with pews and a pulpit, no pictures, statues or any other artwork. I don't remember much about it either. I was baptized into that church when I turned 18 and was on my way into the military. I think it was more of me "covering all my bases" than a real commitment. I was a senior in high-school, I didn't want to commit to anything. I had just joined the Navy because I didn't want to be drafted. At that time, most draftees were being sent to Vietnam. 

The military had all kinds of "chaplains" ironically, the only ones I met were Catholic Chaplains. It's "ironic" because my record clearly stated that I was Protestant. 

My first ship, the USS Oriskany took me all over the Pacific and Indian oceans. Everywhere we went there was always a Catholic Church and the Catholic Chaplain always made it a point to invite me to "tour" the Church with him. Many of them were very old and very elaborate with sculptures, paintings and stained glass. Many people have what I will call an "uneducated view" of the religious sculptures, paintings and other artworks. The artwork in a Catholic Church comes from a time when most people could not read or write. Many of the great Masters could not read, but they wanted to glorify God. They did so through their artwork. What I see in especially the old Churches is the Bible in pictures and sculptures. Michelangelo, painter of the Sistine Chapel, creator of many statues - most notably, "David", architect of St. Peter's Dome, and much more, could not read or write; but he could praise God and preach the Gospel through his hands, to others who like him, could not read the scriptures but they could "read" his sculptures and paintings. It's the God that the artwork portrays that is being worshiped, not the artwork nor the artist. 

Is it wrong to sit down and gaze upon a picture of someone long past, say, a parent? Someone you might have loved very much, and yearn for them to come back? Is it wrong to look at that picture and talk to that person as if he or she was there with you and tell him or her how much you miss him or her? Is it wrong for you to believe the person in that picture is in Heaven looking after you? Is it wrong to ask the person in the picture for help and believe that he or she is praying with you to God for an answer? Is it wrong to go to the grave-site of someone you love and discuss a problem with them? Is it wrong to ask that loved one to help you pray or to pray with you to God? 

Through the Catholic Church, architecture and art, I have come to know and believe in two families; my earthly one, consisting of my parents and sisters, and my spiritual family, consisting of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. Pictures of my earthly family come from cameras, pictures of my spiritual family were made by the Masters. Both are made by humans. 

 The Rosary - nothing seems to say Catholic more than the Rosary. I've heard many say that it isn't found in the Bible. That's true, very true, the Rosary is in fact not found in any Bible. But, the Bible is in fact in the Rosary. Again, artwork created for those who could not read or write. The Rosary through it’s mysteries, contain the New Testament, from the birth of Jesus to his death, resurrection and beyond. I use it every day as an aid in prayer, it helps to "make the world around me go away", so that I can speak and listen more reverently and clearly to God. If non-Catholics would just listen to the words or read the Rosary, especially the last sentence of the "Hail Mary," they would know that we are not praying to Mary or anyone else, we are in-fact praying only to God. 

 My commitment to God and to religion did not happen over night. It happened over many years of searching self and soul; searching the earthly world and the spiritual world; searching various religions, cultures and ways of life. I have called on St. Peter, St. Paul and a few other saints who were once as human as I am now, in just the same way I still call on my Dad and Mom for advice. Catholicism as I know it, is not a religion, it's a way of life. A way of life defined not by anything earthly, but by a God that is open to everyone, a God who is compassionate but demanding unquestioned faith and belief. 

 The self and soul search goes on, the earthly world tries to pull me in one direction, the spiritual world tries to pull me in another direction. I put no boundaries between worlds, I try my best not to judge anyone in either world. I do my best to leave judgment to God. 

It doesn't matter what we label ourselves as, Protestant, Catholic, Jehovah Witness, Methodist, ... What matters, to God, is how we live. Do we follow Jesus and his disciples? Or do we judge each other on how we go about our daily lives, how we as individuals worship, or how we as individuals interpret individual passages in the Bible? Do we throw away the Bible and peck at each other over "our" individual interpretation of individual passages of a very large book? 

God made us all different, maybe we should accept the differences and accept each other as brothers and sisters the way Jesus accepted his disciples and all those who believed and had faith in him. "Catholic" is only a label, how and what I believe and have faith in along with how I worship is my way of life. It is between me and God and wrong for me to judge others on their way of life. 

Lastly, through my research, Catholicism teaches me that I should not only "love" all of humanity, but that I should also respect everyone's race, age, sex, career, culture, customs, traditions, character, religion and their points of view. Essentially, as a Catholic, I should respect every aspect of every person's life. It is OK to respectfully disagree with someone but wrong to disrespect them or any part of their being. So, bring on your criticisms of my religious practices. I'll just pass them on to the Lord and let Him deal with them.

[runawaysiren940]

Hey. I’m a subscriber to your channel! (I’m a bi woman & a radfem, fyi.)

I remember reading a comment recently. I think it was from you. It mentioned that you were going to talk about western women converting to islam.

I hope you do a video on it. I don’t want to write an essay in this ask, so I’ll TRY to keep this brief, but I do have a lot to say.

During the early years of the Syrian civil war, I began to read a lot about it and supported Assad and Iran over ISIL. I was very left wing and I hated my own conservative government (but I somehow saw no irony in supporting muslim conservatives. The same thing continues in the left today). I began to learn about islam gradually, utterly minimizing things like jiziya, taqiyya, and executions for apostates, homosexuals, and adulterers because the Nice Muslims insisted it wasn’t “true Islam”. They would always push outsiders to read the quran. They insisted islam gave rights to women before anyone else. If a woman respects herself, she will become a muslimah and cover herself, and so on. There’s so much more I could talk about. I could write for hours on the fuckheadedness and misogyny of even moderate islam in retrospect. At the time, I was rationalizing it basically because I hated my own country, I’d always been a bit of a rebel, and islam claimed to have all the answers.

I was still very young (19), naive, and impressionable. I worried I’d never get married in western culture (I didn’t believe in sex before love and assurance that I wouldn’t be used & dumped, and the vast majority of western men only want easy sex), and muslim men will marry very quickly if you’re a “good woman”. I became scared I’d go to hell because “the prophet said hell is full of women”, and they weren’t even there for severe sins. I have a lot of empathy for young women sucked into this because it’s so easy if you don’t already have a firm understanding of who you are. New western converts are absolutely lovebombed. I wouldn’t be surprised if they feel they’re finding their true family and belonging once they convert.

I did end up converting for a short while. Thank goodness I never got married or started having kids. While I was being indoctrinated, however, I found myself supporting some extreme views. Thank goodness I wasn’t in a highly muslim area, as I knew what they thought of those who leave the religion. Someone is in danger if they openly leave, hence why many formers are secretive about it. They’re basically declaring that they’re apostates, blasphemers, and unbelievers. It’s scary to think of even now because of how many people think they should be killed.

I thought anyone who drew the prophet deserved punishment (not that I would do any violence), and I was a moderate. I’d read everything possible to rationalize the prophet marrying a child, because that was a tough sell. It worked for a short while. 🤮 Did I mention I was first penetrated as a 10 year old, and I didn’t think I suffered greatly from it, therefore Aisha may not have suffered when married so young? I rationalized utterly disturbing shit while indoctrinated. Yes, they all rationalize it. They even say girls reach puberty younger in a desert climate. 🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮 I’m glad that I got out so soon, and in a safe area. I wasn’t baby-trapped or drawn to the IS. I came to my senses and realized, “No, this isn’t protection for women. It is patriarchy, and I don’t care if they think I’ll go to hell!” I kept many secrets while muslim. One of them is how arab and persian muslims really think of black people (it’s not good. It’s horrific and sad. They even hate literal babies) despite flowery words to those who convert. More than 10 years later, I’m so glad I got out of the cult. Maybe it helped me clock the pink & blue cult early.

I will say, one parallel that can be drawn between muslims and TRAs is the treatment of those who leave. To any non-muslim who defends islam, go look at comments on videos by former muslims. See what the good “real” muslims say. “You were never Muslim.” “You’ll go to hell.” “Death to unbelievers.”

Then look at how people who formerly identified as trans (especially women who underwent testosterone therapy 😔) are treated by the trans community. “You were never trans!” “You knew the risks!” “Shut up and kys!”

Thank you for sharing your story. I welcome the insight.

[aimportantdragoncollector]

For Trioholders I'll suggest a Xiaolin Showdown AU. If you haven't seen the show you can disregard this, though I will recommend you give it a watch at some point, it's a fun show.

If you have seen it- the trio are xiaolin warriors trying to collect all the shen gong wu and protect the world from the heylin side. All three will be the dragon of one of the four elements (even though there's only 3 of them...) with Yoichi playing the role of omi, and AFO playing the role of Chase Young, trying to convert Yoichi to the Heylin side as his apprentice.

I have seen Xiaolin Showdown! What a blast from the past.

1. Yoichi is the young dragon of water. He and his brother were orphans raised at the temple together, until his big brother ran off to become evil. AFO is a huge embarrassment to Yoichi and he tries to pretend not to be related to him--which would be easier if AFO didn't call Yoichi "little brother" as soon as they ran into each other.

2. Kaiji is the dragon of fire. When they first meet, Kaiji is obsessed with technology and generally distant. Since Yoichi was raised in a temple, he's secretly fascinated with the outside world and wants to learn more. His secret pleasure is his weekly shipment of hair care products. Yoichi's favorite show is Captain Hero, because it's the only cartoon he's ever seen. The temple has a few ancient DVDs but no internet. When they first meet, Kaiji disses Captain Hero as an old-fashioned show and earns Yoichi's ire. They fight all the time. Secretly, Yoichi thinks that Kaiji is cool and Kaiji was infatuated with Yoichi from the moment they met.

3. Sanzou is the dragon of wind. He's calmer than the other two and plays peacemaker. Kaiji and Yoichi frequently fight over Sanzou's approval/affection. However Sanzou is fully aware that Kaiji and Yoichi have crushes on each other and feels like a third wheel. Sanzou does not realize they both like him too, because he has a blindspot in this one particular place.

4. Hikage Shinomori is the dragon of earth, younger by the others by a couple years. He's the true third wheel, forced to watch his seniors' endless romantic drama. He frequently hides in the temple basement to get away from it all.

5. Tomura Shigaraki is playing the role of Jack Spicer, competing with the trio for Shen Gong Wu and desperate to win AFO's approval. He's also perpetually caught up in the love triangle drama, and has a weird pseudo-friendship with Hikage over it.

6. AFO keeps taking advantage of how easy it is to magically force people to become evil/good in the Xiaolin Showdown universe to mind-control Yoichi. In turn, Yoichi is totally shameless about trying to force his brother to become good. There's a lot of face heel turns. In fact, one time Yoichi gets taken over by bad chi, but then when the other three come to rescue him, it's revealed that his chi is already fine and he sheepishly returns. It's unclear if it only worked because Yoichi expected it to work or if he just secretly wanted to spend some time with his big brother.

7. AFO also fakes being turned good repeatedly to steal Shen Gong Wu and Yoichi always falls for it. (In Yoichi's defense he's a preteen in this AU.) Also even when AFO gets turned good a couple times, he's still ruthless and basically only cares about Yoichi. He's just on a different side. Yoichi is in deep denial about this because he wants to believe his brother is good deep down when not influenced by that horrible villain "Garaki Bean."

8. In fact, you know that arc where Omi changes the past to bring Chase Young to the side of good? When Yoichi does that to AFO, nothing changes because it turns out AFO is just the same no matter his chi. Also when given a chance to sacrifice himself to repair the timeline, good AFO is just like..."nah I want to make my little brother happy and that means staying by his side. The timeline can get wrecked." Good ending maybe?

(All of these are free to use in my Three Weeks of Trioholders event.)

[nokingsonlyfooles]

Proximity Alarm! Or, What Even Is Culture? Or, Funny, You Sure Look Jewish...

I've gotta get this out of my head because it's... Well, the thing is, it's NOT weird to me, but I think it would be weird to other people, so I'm just trying to calibrate myself. The following will be tangled brain yarn.

I'm name-checking an old joke, but maybe you never strayed across it. A little old lady on the bus says to a younger man, "Pardon me, are you Jewish?" He says, "No, sorry." But she really won't let up about it, she's asking him if he knows certain families in her neighbourhood and trying to get him to trust her and open up and finally he loses all patience and says, "Okay! You found me out! I am Jewish! Will there be anything else?" And the punchline, of course, is "Funny, you don't look Jewish."

I've strayed across a fellow NB who shares a lot of my intersections, but the European side of their family is Jewish and mine is Catholic, except...

Right away, our roots are in Eastern Europe, so I let them know, Hey, we eat a lot of the same food! Potato pancakes and Manischewitz, right off the bat. I probably could've namechecked kolache and had some recognition too, due to the Slavic countries trading language like Pokémon cards.

But it's not just that. I picked up a lot of stray Yiddish as a kid, either from people who were near or in my family. I try not to use it now, because somebody might get upset when I step on their culture... But if I grew up with it, what do you call it?

I think part of this is because my mom ALMOST married a certified Nice Jewish Boy. He had a delicate old grandmother who would have literally died if she knew he was engaged to a Catholic girl. Mom had to go to synagogue and pass, and prepare to convert. Grandma lived, even if the engagement didn't, so I gotta figure Mom did pass, or Bubbie was smarter than she let on and just let the family pretend. But, all that stuff my mom picked up, on top of the Eastern European background, she kept.

So, my standard, "bounce the fussy baby" song was "Hava Nagila." Mom also taught my cousin Debbie and her kids got bounced to that song! I probably learned how to sing that, phonetically, before I could walk. I had a book with Schlemiel stories in it. I knew how to keep the pastrami and the corned beef Kosher, even if not what to call it. CHEESE? No! We don't put cheese on this meat! Unthinkable! Deli mustard, okay? I didn't have a Reuben with Swiss until I was well into my adult years. I dunno, it just seemed wrong. (I got over it, I like 'em now.)

The result of this is, when I was a kid, I wasn't even trying to pass and I passed. I got a babysitting gig with a Jewish family. I saw the Manischewitz in the pantry with the matzohs and said, "Oh, my mom and Nana love this. Yours too?" The kid couldn't contain herself anymore, and spoke the opening line of that old joke, "Are you JEWISH?" With disbelief. 'Cos I resemble my dad's side of the family too, just with fairer skin. I don't look Jewish.

But I kinda do, too?

And I wonder. I was told my great grandmother on my grandpa's side spoke "Swiss," almost exclusively, such that my mom couldn't understand her. Not Czech, that was different. Well, "Swiss" ain't a language, so what was it? I assumed, because Mom really didn't like Germans, it must've been German. She refused to say "Czech-German," even. She'd say, "Czech-Swiss." That side of the family emigrated from Prague when it was still in Bohemia, well before admitting to Jewish heritage would've gotten you dead in the Holocaust, but there was antisemitism in Eastern Europe at that time too. Kinda always? People got converted by force, and just to blend in. Mom wouldn't have been able to tell between Yiddish and German as a kid. I mean, they're close.

I do know she reprimanded me for saying "schmuck" as a small child. "No, no, that's really rude." "Can I say 'putz'?" "...That's a little better."

And I remember, as she was arranging us in the mirror one day, she told us we had "noble noses." Roman noses. It seemed weird to me, that why I remember. I didn't have a problem with my nose. Why go out of your way to tell me what to call the shape of it? I don't think it even looks particularly "Roman," although it does turn down slightly at the tip. Grandpa's was similar, but more pronounced. Did he go out of his way to tell her it was called that? Did his mom do the same? Is this merely the result of swimming in the bog-standard antisemitism of the past and wanting to differentiate yourself from your Jewish neighbors in the nicest possible way, or are we hiding something?

I'm divorced from my family. I got no one I can ask. But even as a kid, the Pribek family history vanished at Ellis Island somewhere around the turn of the 20th century. We looked for 'em and couldn't find 'em, so a name change may have occurred. My dad had a genealogy hobby and traced the Gonzalez clan all the hell over the place, but Pribek resisted the level of research he was able to do at the time. Joss, my maternal grandma's family, was doable. We found a baseball hall-of-famer! But Pribek? No. I was told, vaguely, that a distant relative had a statue somewhere in Prague, but I don't have a name to look for.

While I was in high school with that babysitting gig, I participated in "Knowledge Bowl" basically a pub quiz, but we'll call it educational and put it on our college applications. The teacher helping us "train" divided up subjects and tried to assign us to learn things we were already familiar with. She was Jewish. She surveyed a pool of mainly Hispanic, white, and South Asian kids and said, "Does anyone know anything about Judaism?" Nope. Nope. Finally, my smartass hand goes up, to be funny. "I've seen Fiddler on the Roof a bunch of times!" I had. We had it on VHS. I got the laugh I wanted, and the teacher said, "Okay, then you learn about Judaism!"

It wasn't much. I memorized some Cliff notes-style information and forgot most of the details, until I took World Religion in college and got reminded. But, broad strokes, I already had most of it. I had the idea of it. Not "obey the law" like Catholicism - Catholics famously do not read the Bible - but know the law, so you can have an argument about it and defend your position. OK, God. I've read your demands. Now let's negotiate!

What the heck do you call growing up so near a thing, but being told over and over again that you're not of it? That's not you. We just do all these very similar things for a different reason. Even if you look a bit similar, it's for a different reason. It's all explainable that way, I guess, but it's still in my brain. So whose culture is it? What even is "culture"?

I honestly don't know, but if you come to my house with latkes, I will steal them and eat them. Seriously, I've done that. I think they were leftovers, but later it occurred to me that my husband's friend may have intended to take them home and eat them himself. I'm so sorry, my dude. You had to put up with your friend's apparently-Mexican spouse screaming, "ARE THOSE LATKES? I LOVE LATKES!" and running for the sour cream and applesauce.

They were really good, though.

[daughter-of-sapph0]

You converted into Judaism I believe? I’ve occasionally considered converting (Haven’t looked into it yet), and am curious as to what led to your decision to convert

hi, thanks for asking. I started my conversion process around three years ago. it's been a rough process, but so far it's going well. as for why I decided, it's a long story. so I'll try my best to keep it short

I was raised catholic. my grandfather was Irish catholic, and raised my mother catholic. my father on the other hand was raised lutheran. you would think that would make their marriage extremely controversial, an Irish catholic woman marrying a protestant man. but it was actually really chill for both families. my dad was never really religious, but my mom was a devoted catholic who had us go to church and ccd every week, up until I went to middle school. I went to the tiniest private middle school in existence. there were 15 kids in all of eighth grade. the building was over 100 years old. it almost closed twice during my three years there. and honestly, it kinda sucked. so much that my two younger siblings both went to public middle schools to try and avoid the shit I went through.

since I went to a catholic private school, I was taught a fair amount of religious history alongside the basic middle school education. it wasn't the first thing that helped me open up to other religions, but being forced to study the history of other world religions was a big eye opener for me. I got confirmed in 8th grade, and then immediately stopped caring about religion. I was an atheist for most of my first two years of high school. I wasn't one of the annoying reddit atheists, I still respected other people's religions. I just didn't know what to believe in myself.

around this time I went through a major depression after my grandmother died, and struggled with my grades and suicidal thoughts. I got into twitter (which, let's be honest, is not the healthiest coping mechanism) and met a lot of friends who helped me discover myself. I eventually came out as transgender and my friends online and irl were super supportive. and a lot of my trans friends online were also Jewish. I started to learn more about their religion just from talking with them, and I actually found it really interesting. it wasn't anything like christianity. people were encouraged to question things and argue and debate.

it was a bit after a graduated high school when I started to think about whether or not I wanted to convert, and about a year later when I spoke to a local rabbi. I will be honest, the pandemic has made it extremely fucking difficult. mostly everything is online, and that makes it a huge pain. but I wouldn't be going through this huge tedious process of converting if I didn't know for certain that it is exactly what I want to do. I love Judaism. I love my Jewish friends. I love my religion. I love my own unique personal relationship that I have with god and myself. it's hard to even put into words. the same feeling I had when I came out as trans is the same feeling I have towards Judaism.

if you're considering converting, look into it first. it's a very difficult process. and that's intentional. Judaism is not a proselytizing religion. it's supposed to be a very hard and difficult process with lots of obstacles. you have to be 1000% sure that Judaism is the correct religion for you.

and that's where I'm at now. I sometimes say that I'm Jewish, but really I'm still in the process of converting. but based on how much I've learned and how much I've experienced, I'm more than certain that this is the religion for me.

[findingtarshish]

WHO IS THIS HARMONY? LET'S FIND OUT!! 💗🌈💢👁️🌌👪📎📎

ALRIGHT TIME TO BECOME AND UNSKIPPABLE CUTSCENE First off, if you'd like to learn about Harmony, here's her character sheet That said I've updated it uhhhhhh a lot since so just dm me if you want the link to the actual doc

NOW. AHEM.

💗 GROWING HEART - if they have a crush, is it noticeable? what changes when they're in love?

Harmony falls in love easily and often. She finds it very hard to hide her affection, and generally confesses pretty fast. She presently has a wife, Olivia, a girlfriend, Ekaterina, and a boyfriend, Elliot, and she usually feels warmest and safest when she's with them.

🌈 RAINBOW - what advice would they give to their younger self?

The funny answer is "Don't date that guy" to avoid the whole sitch with her ex-boyfriend. Her real answer would probably be "Go home from school early on September 17th, 2008" in a misguided attempt to prevent her mother's death, the trauma of which has shaped her later childhood and much of her adult life.

💢 ANGER - what are some habits they have that will take some getting used to?

Her consensualism, probably. She is fanatically consensualist, and is very judgemental toward anyone who feeds without consent. If she catches you alleycatting, she will probably try to convert you to consensualism. She did this to her wife (originally a bagger) before they were married.

👁️ EYE - what colour are their eyes? do people notice their eyes? is there anything special about them (shows emotion easily, literally magical...)?

Harmony's eyes are a very dark grey, and sometimes look like they're black.

🌌 MILKY WAY - what was the inspiration behind your oc? what was the first thing you decided about them?

Harmony was my first VTM character. She was initially heavily inspired by Silas Reed, from LoadingReadyRun's Actual Play Not A Drop To Drink: Vancouver Island By Night, which was one of my first exposures to WoD. The idea was to create a diplomatic Kindred that stood at the crux between Anarch and Camarilla, the sort of person that would be called on to mediate talks between sects; as I developed her more, she ended up choosing violence, and her focus on her consensualism became much more important.

👪 FAMILY - what is their family like? what is your ocs relationship to them? does your oc have any siblings?

EXTENDED. She has: Her wife, Olivia, whose sire they killed together (The couple that slays together stays together, yknow); Her sire (and girlfriend) Ekaterina/Katherine; Her mortal stepdad, Keith; Her mortal sister, Melody, who is also a mage (Discovering this was a funny scene); Her grandsire, Ceridwen, whom she idolizes; and her older blood sibling, Cayetano, whom she has a... complicated relationship with. She is intensely loyal to her family (except Cayetano) and will do anything for them.

📎PAPERCLIP - a random fact. (x2!)

1) Harmony is an antiquarian and book conservationist by trade. She specializes in commission work for preserving personal artifacts, and in work for Kindred libraries- if your Book of Nod is falling apart and you need it repaired or a facsimile made, she's your girl!

2) Harmony has a plushie named Baffie (short for Baphomet) which her sister gave to her while she was in the hospital when she was 15 (it's a long story that even her character sheet doesn't really get into). Baffie is a brown vampire bat with little fangs- ironically, her sister's special interest is vampires, ever since she was a kid, so much so that she's writing her undergrad thesis on Dracula. Finding out that vampires were real was an experience for her. Finding out that her sister was one had her apoplectic.

[britcision]

Family death mentions ahead friends

So one of the things I learned in the arrangements for my grandmother’s funeral is that their local priest remembers me

Pretty sure I only ever met him once; he moved in long after we’d left the country, and when I went back for visits church was not a part of them

He was the one who did my grandfather’s funeral

That was an interesting time, and the first time I noticed I am actually dogshit at handling things emotionally; emotionally, I’m usually fine. Sad, tired, got a key on depression, but never what you’d call the depths

No, all of those things get autorepressed before I know they’re there, so my disabled ass processes everything physically

0/10, do not recommend this. I don’t even know what’s stressing me out half the time, I have a crazy flare and have to reverse engineer what’s wrong around that

So I was, y’know, even less disposed to socialising than you might think around Grandpa’s funeral

Didn’t go to the wake, didn’t really talk to anyone. I wrote something for him and I read it in the service, and then we went to see the hole and pour his ashes in

My grandparents lived around the corner from that church before I was born; their direct garden neighbour is the graveyard, and they used to get to church through a pair of abutting doors that led from their garden to the priest’s garden, and then immediately into the graveyard

So when I told the family to go on without me, I’d head home, well, there was no real hesitation

(I do know the legal way around, the new priest wasn’t keen on strangers coming through the garden but I suspect Granny converted him before the end

But I am the grandchild Most Likely To Just Go Hop The Graveyard Fence)

And I sat there for a while, mostly just existing

And the priest came over to see to things, because everyone else had left and he saw them go, and he didn’t think I’d be there

He offered to come back later, but it was fine. It needed to be done, and I wasn’t doing anything that would be affected by it

He warned me a couple of times that it could be hard for people, and he really could just come back, but it was fine

I helped him step down my grandfather’s ashes for when the next person would be interred

(It’s a very old graveyard and while not 100% full as far as I know, they did have a special paved garden where you could pick which stone to have your ashes under along with anyone else in the parish

Very communal, you get all mixed in. As you may suspect, this is not a church holding stock in bodily resurrections)

And we talked a bit about the garden and how that all worked, and I helped fill in the hole and stole a stone

And that was the first and last time I met him

He asked if I’d be okay to go home on my own, and I did not tell him I could just hop the fence. I went around in the street like a good adult and everything

And that was the only time I ever met him

But when they were arranging my Granny’s funeral last month, apparently he mentioned he remembered me

I couldn’t be there this time, being both devoid of an immune system which makes air travel and the UK specifically dangerous as hell, and also sick with some stupid little cold of my own that has lasted a month and will not leave or let me sleep

(Not COVID, I checked, and a round of antibiotics ALMOST kicked it on its head… and then two days ago nope we’re back to up every couple hours because I can’t breathe)

I wrote something for my mother to read, but it just… never occurred to me that he would remember me

The old priest there knew me since before I could walk (I suspect he has passed), and was party to both good and bad childhood stories

This new guy was younger than my parents, we met once and I don’t think we’ll ever meet again, but I have been repeatedly told that I make an impression, even when I’m not trying to

I guess some people are not up for a peaceful chat about death rights while burying their loved ones, but I just…

I’m not sentimental about what is left behind

The important part is what has left, and the body itself needs to be dealt with

He was my grandfather, and it made sense to me to help put him to rest

To do the last thing I ever could with his earthly remains and make sure he was interred with love

It’s apparently not something I should ask anyone to do for me when I’m done, but I don’t mind that. I won’t be there, and I’m not really worried about what happens to the meat that occasionally consented to do what I wanted it to

It is possible that growing up playing chase in a graveyard and nicking shiny stones off the graves gives you a somewhat skewed view of death, but I’d have to talk to my older siblings more to be sure

(I don’t know if the priest even knows I have an older sister. She might have visited their area on her honeymoon, but all the relatives she stayed with only had horror stories to share with me later

She didn’t come for our grandfather’s funeral when my brothers and I did

She doesn’t care about anything but her husband and now her kid, but in a very… obvious way

She barely spoke to any of them

She flew out to see our Granny before she passed with her baby for a day or so, which personally I agree is a better call than going to the funeral, but I dunno if she would have seen him - she could be flying completely under the radar)

I guess I’ve just been thinking about the imprint we leave behind when we’re gone

As a family we tend towards being loud, obvious, and usually weird (on one side - the other tends towards loud, gregarious, and aggressively organising events)

I met that guy once, for probably no more than twenty minutes after the hour long service

He’ll probably never have cause to think about me again in his life, unless he tells that story

But I’ll always know him as the priest who moved in and asked the nice little old lady behind not to cut through his yard, entirely unknowing that she would in fact be organising every church do for the next two decades and would be a stranger for about another week tops

And apparently he remembers me staying behind, chatting about death and interment while we poured the dirt back into the hole and squashed it down until the stone could fit snugly again

We did discuss how many people it would take for it not to go down properly, but they do have a plan in place - that’s why they rotate the stones, so they have about the same volume of people under them

I don’t know if my grandmother was cremated

If she was, it was three days before Bonfire Night, and they just barely missed the very funniest funeral possible, but I don’t think the family will be ready for that observation for a few more years at least

If she was, I don’t know if they’ll put her under the same stone

I think I asked if you could make requests, but it’s been a long time; I don’t remember the answer

There will be a couple extra tenants in there with them, if they do, which would make her very happy. She was a compulsive host all her life

You also don’t exactly get only your own loved one’s ashes back from the crematorium

I think you can make a special request and pay extra, but it is much less energy efficient to cool and clean the oven between each body

You just sort of get the sweepings at the end of the day, portioned out between everyone

You can also have your ashes specially compressed and turned into a diamond at a different company or all sorts of other things, but you need a lot of ash to make a very small diamond because the key word there is “compression”, along with “heat”, “pressure”, and “extreme”

It may be worth storing more than one person’s worth of ash to make something more notable

There would be something poetic in having your ashes mixed with your partner’s into a single stone for the rest of eternity

I do sort of want mine to be tossed off a tall building in a wind storm though, so that’s for the rest of y’all

Organise the polycule and go for a statement piece

But do put one of those anti moisture bags in with the ashes while you’re waiting for everyone else to go, because the brick would probably be harder to ship by weight

It is entirely possible that I’m just weird about death all on my own, honestly

But if the worst thing some people can imagine is there being just… nothing at all, you just stop existing, that sounds pretty good to me

Like my Granny, I am also a compulsive entertainer - I’m pathologically bad at just sitting and hanging out at peoples’ houses. We have to be going somewhere, doing something, have some form of outside stimuli

Even just “you’re with everyone you love having a wonderful time forever and ever” sounds exhausting

Living is hard, people are hard, and I have ADHD so I guarantee I will find a way to get sick of eternity even with all the wonders of the universe to explore

All I want is peace and the chance to just stop

Failing that, I nominate we all build the tumblr island as whatever lies beyond and develop post-vital memes that will take decades to bring the newly dead up to speed on

[chelledoggo]

hey, i saw your post about anti theists and progressive Christians, and it reminded me of something that happened with my anti theist dad recently

my college has an event where every club gets to set up a table and basically advertise their club. i volunteered to help with my college's witch club's table, which, being registered as a religious organization, was put next to some tables for Christian clubs. we were very lucky that the table next to us was so incredibly kind. we had at least three different representatives of the club (including the director herself) come up to us and talk to us about how theyd love to do a collab with our club, how theyve collabed with the Jewish club on campus before, and how they love learning about other religions and practices. they were progressive too, wearing shirts with that "we believe science is real..." quote and at least one of their members wearing pride pins

i told my dad about how kind that Christian club was, detailing everything i said above and more. his response? "theyre trying to convert you." i insisted that they werent, that i asked them if i could go to club meetings when im not Christian (i wasnt then but i am now) and they said yes, and reiterating their collaborations with clubs of other faiths. he didnt budge

so i guess moral of the story: there's no pleasing anti theists when it comes to anything religion related

i'm so sorry about that.

big kudos to that Christian club for offering to collab with other religious clubs.

i really would love that to be the trend Christianity goes in going forward, now that younger people are working to turn the tides of the church in a positive direction.

[maaruin]

When this post went across my dash last time, I wondered if I should write something about the issue of being approached in public based on the cases when it happens with a non-dating-motive. No one has tried to ask me out in public, because I’m a man and that rarely happens to men. But people have tried to 1) get me to subscribe to newspapers, 2) get me to sign up for monthly donations to NGOs, 3) get me to vote for their party in the next election, 4) try to convert me to their religion or ideology.

And the thing is, these weren’t all unpleasant experiences. They range from unpleasant to pleasant.

On the unpleasant side we have an instance where I had the “subscribe to our newspaper”-guy explain what they were offering and I said something along the lines of “I don’t think I am interested”. Then he tried to convince me to do so and I said “no” more firmly. And his superior got angry with me not saying “no” at the beginning of the conversation instead of taking up his underlings time. Or another instance, when I said to one of the “donate to us”-guys (at my door instead of just in public) “I’m sorry, I can’t”, he said “If you were sorry you would donate!”.

On the pleasent side, I got Mormonism explained to me by two guys who had “Elder” on their badge even though they were younger than me, and also told them a bit about my own beliefs. I actually met up with them after that once, but I was very clear before that that “I am interested in learning about your beliefs but I don’t think I will convert”. In another instance I had a discussion with a Trotskyist about where she thought the Russian Revolution went wrong and what her political ideas for the future were.

So my experience (which may not be universal) is that talking with people-who-want-something-from-you in public can be enjoyable if they aren’t too results focussed, are passionate about that thing they want to sell you on, and take no for an answer. But those aren’t the majority of the people who try to approach me in public. The majority want me to sign up for something because they want my money. And with them I always have to worry about underhanded tactics, or at least that they demand I justify my rejection to them.

But these people do it because it gets them results, and as long as doing this brings in more money than it costs paying the people who do the approaching, they will do it. And if I am being honest, if I am stuck with them, I would prefer to meet more of the pleasant approachers in public to balance it out. People who, as I said, aren’t just focussed on getting results, are open to have a genuine conversations, don’t try to trick me, and don’t get mad if I say no.

But that’s just my experience and I don’t know if it translates to being asked out in public. I don’t even know if it translates to the other people’s experience with promoters and missionaries.

"how do i know a woman wants me to talk to her in the grocery store" are you an elderly woman with valuable information about cooking, cleaning, or saving money? if you answered no, then women do not want to talk to you in the grocery store.

[bookoformon]

3 Nephi, Chapter 6. Part 2. "The Order."

Even after an amazing miracle, the revelation of the Plates of Nephi, the text warns the Robbers were going to betray the people, and they did. So long as there is null enforcement of the law, the Robbers will return to the scene of the crime. They will try bigger and more elaborate works of evil and they will succeed because no one will know what to do.

This is what happened when George W Bush and Dick Cheney pulled our bra cups up over our heads and faked terrorist attacks on New York and DC, and then invaded Iraq and Aghanistan so Dick could play in a sandbox down the street from where Jesus grew up in Israel during his retirement. They got away with it. Then came Donald Trump and a huge list of felonies and war crimes, and then comes now. All of Dick and Don's friends are watching Europe go up in flames, refusing to put the key in the ignition and do what is right.

The Book of Mormon says all we need "are a few who are firm and willing" and we can get rid of the Republicans and this nagging evil on the other side of the world forever:

10 But it came to pass in the twenty and ninth year there began to be some disputings among the people; and some were lifted up unto pride and boastings because of their exceedingly great riches, yea, even unto great persecutions;

11 For there were many merchants in the land, and also many lawyers, and many officers.

12 And the people began to be distinguished by ranks, according to their riches and their chances for learning; yea, some were ignorant because of their poverty, and others did receive great learning because of their riches.

13 Some were lifted up in pride, and others were exceedingly humble; some did return railing for railing, while others would receive railing and persecution and all manner of afflictions, and would not turn and revile again, but were humble and penitent before God.

14 And thus there became a great inequality in all the land, insomuch that the church began to be broken up; yea, insomuch that in the thirtieth year the church was broken up in all the land save it were among a few of the Lamanites who were converted unto the true faith; and they would not depart from it, for they were firm, and steadfast, and immovable, willing with all diligence to keep the commandments of the Lord.

Riches are okay- braggings, boastings and persecutions, these are not okay. Society needs merchants, lawyers, and "officers" in order to function but if they abuse state power or refuse to use it appropriately and law enforcement watches, then one risks what we have risked: the possibility of a world war and now we've got our Third. How did that happen?

Merchants "travel by ship to trade." Merchants in Judaism represent scholarship. They ensure life within the self external to it is fresh, new, interesting, and innovative.

We have allowed a bunch of hogwashers, the Republicans and Mormons who think a box of plates in upstate New York, left there by Navajos from ancient times tell them it is okay to fuchk their kids and they are willing to protect this belief with lethal force.

If only I were 40 years younger! Rrawr!

A little scholarship would have explained a miracle happened when Abe Lincoln and co. took those brand new brass printing plates they created in Nauvoo, Illinois, applied ink to them and minted the first real copies of the Book of Mormon in 1829.

Lawyers provide religions with their princpals. When we learn in Sunday School how angry God became when men turned violent, and He regretted making the world, the little lawyer inside each of us should register a spiritual direction for the soul that leads away from violence. This principalled point of view is meant to be lifelong.

Officers take orders from the conscience and give them to the faculties.

If these three aspects of divination go awry, then persecution is the result.

The Values in Gematria for the above verses are:

v. 10: The Twenty and Ninth Year after the BOC. The Value in Gematria is 9668, ח‎טוו‎ ‎, "he ordered."

v. 14: The Thirtieth Year after the BOC. The Value in Gematria is 9844, טחדד‎, tahdad, "sharpen up."